National state of emergency declared as it turns ‘a bit cold’ in London

The Prime Minister is to chair an emergency meeting of COBRA following a snowflake was reported to have settled on the pavement in London’s Oxford Street.

Well rehearsed emergency plans are already being implemented to ensure disruption is minimized and Sky News is running wall-to-wall coverage of the crisis. Programme Anchor Stephen Dixon advised viewers: ‘It looks like we could have up to a one-flake covering throughout the South of England so we need to prepare for road closures, train cancellations and intermittent power cuts. Don’t drive unless it’s absolutely necessary.’

A spokesman for The Met Office said: ‘This just might get pretty bad and there could be major problems. Perhaps even as bad as that time we had one whole half a centimetre and the South went into total lockdown for a month.’

The hashtag #PrayForTheHomeCounties is currently trending on Twitter and The Army is on standby.

Meanwhile the Midlands and Northern areas of Britain remain largely unaffected having only to deal with their usual seasonal blizzards and three foot snowdrifts.

One thought on “National state of emergency declared as it turns ‘a bit cold’ in London

  1. It must be cold….I’ve heard reports that Northerner’s have got their big coats out, and a Geordie has ironed his t-shirt ready to put on if the temperature drops any further (although this has not yet been confirmed).

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