Terrible tattoo gaffes soon to be a thing of the past

If you’ve had a dreadfully drawn tattoo, or even worse, been the victim of an embarrassing misspelling, then help is at hand.

Because plastic surgeons at Guy’s Hospital have come up with a way to tattoo natural skin tones over the top of even the darkest ink colours, thus obliterating all traces of any previous calamitous and cack-handed tatts without the need for painful and costly removal surgery.

Inksman to the stars, Billy McHugh, who runs one select studio in Holmes Chapel told reporters, ‘This is a real game changer and once the technique’s properly licensed will bring true relief to artists such as myself, who, by the way, may or may not be facing substantial legal actions over the odd slip we might’ve made during high profile client appointments.’

Meanwhile Darren Ross, Britain’s most tattooed man; a man so badly addicted to getting inked that there is currently not even one inch of his body left to cover is simply cock-a-hoop.

Speaking on The Jeremy Kyle Show he said: ‘This is fantastic news. I’ve already booked a course of treatments to cover up some of my old mistakes. In particular I’ll be saying adios to my full-back Jimmy Savile and replacing him with Jedward, but even better, I can finally get my Mum’s name spelt correctly and have her Karl Malden schnozzle tidied up too.’

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