Four days after the final whistle sounded at Wednesday’s World Cup semifinal between England and Croatia, the nation has now gone into party-overdrive today with calls from politicians and business leaders for a national holiday to be declared and celebration parades in our cities.
Because within five minutes of the game ending, former EastEnders star Ross Kemp took to Twitter to confirm that there would be no more videos of him topless and looking like a 24 carat gurning plank.
And although it’s been an anxious wait since Kemp looks to be as good as his word continuing to honour his promise.
One GP, Dr Alan Manson from Leicester, said: ‘This is a shot in the arm for the country. After his celebration videos went viral I had an endless stream of patients in my waiting room coming to see me suffering from PTSD and acute trauma symptoms. It was pure hell.’
It’s understood that Twitter had been on the point of suspending the Walford hard-nut’s account but today a spokesman for the social media microblogging giant said: ‘Suspension was being considered because although we are firm believes in freedom of expression at all times, no matter how vile it can sometime be, Ross had crossed the line.’
‘It is a relief that he seems to have seen the error of his ways and is now behaving himself. If he keeps his nose clean from here onwards then he keeps his account.’
Meanwhile Internet fans are being advised to exercise extreme caution this afternoon during the third place play-off match in case Kemp falls off the wagon should England somehow defeat Belgium.