Quick to decry any deal on Brexit being suggested by his own government colleagues as ‘bad for Britain and a complete capitulation to the EU’, Tory backbench MP Boris Johnson has been scathing towards his former boss Theresa May in recent weeks.
But many commentators are now pointing out he has been noticeably light on any detail of his own, to the point of not having suggested even one idea on how he would actually do a better job for the country.
Speaking the media outside his home in Thame Johnson said: ‘The proposed draft deal is a terrible deal for Britain, simply allowing the EU to ride roughshod over us. It is a clear and arrogant insult to the massive 52% majority of voters who voted for Brexit in the referendum.’
However when pressed to put some meat on the bones of his alternative vision and what he would do were he to be given the chance to negotiate he replied: ‘I-I-I-I-I-I… um-um-um-um… Well I certainly would never have agreed with this current nonsense. The proposed draft deal is a terrible deal for Britain, simply allowing the EU to ride roughshod over us. It is a clear and arrogant insult to the massive 52% majority of voters who voted for Brexit in the referendum.’
Still unhappy with Mr Johnson’s response he was quizzed further and challenged to reveal just one single idea that he would bring to the negotiating table. ‘Well I should certainly start by ring-fencing that £350 million pounds a week we’re paying the EU and give it to the NHS inste… ah… yes… erm… hang on a sec… that yarn was shown to have been total bollocks wasn’t it? OK, well how about this then?…erm… I say, look! isn’t that a double rainbow over there?’
It’s understood he then threw several handfuls of sand blinding reporters before quickly running back indoors without waiting for a response.