Gregg Wallace from TV’s Masterchef who knows sod all about actual cooking but nevertheless earns a nice living bellowing ‘two minutes remaining!’ and that his show ‘could change someone’s life for ever!’ has finally seen his prediction come to pass.

Because in a significant life change, David Wilson, a Company Director from Cirencester, is beginning a six-month prison sentence for attempted GBH against Wallace, after admitting he finally ‘lost it’ when filming this year’s semi-final.

Conducting his own defence and asking for leniency after a guilty verdict had been returned, Wilson addressed Mr Justice Featherstone: ‘I was forced into it. Six weeks of him endlessly roaring, gurning to the camera, talking utter bollocks and cracking on he knows about cooking when the whole country knows he doesn’t just took its toll.’

‘Things came to a head when he suggested what I was going to present to the critics was a ‘confused dish’. That was it, I finally snapped and went for him with a filleting knife but he hid underneath the bench and I couldn’t get at him properly. Now come on, Your Honour, put yourself in my position, what would you have done?’

In his summing-up and before handing down the sentence, Justice Featherstone remarked: ‘I am minded to show some discretion and therefore pass a sentence of six months imprisonment, rather than the maximum one of ten years allowable for the offence, only because along with millions of viewers you were undoubtedly provoked beyond all human endurance.’