Nigel Farage has declared The Brexit Party’s display of petulant childish behaviour today at Strasbourg, when he and his class chums turned their backs for the playing of European Anthem during the opening of the new session of the European Assembly: ‘verwy bold and weally weally wicked and naughty.’

‘Well we certainly showed them alright,’ said a cock-a-hoop Master Farage (est. age 5¾) as he ate his sherbet dip-dab and sported a back-to-front Disney baseball cap. ‘And what we did today is just the beginning of our disruption strategy codename thorns in your side.’

‘Our next initiative will see us refusing to eat our greens in the refectory, we will only accept jelly and custard from the dinner ladies and after we’ve eaten so much of that we shall be verwy verwy sick, then we shan’t go to bed without getting at least two bedtime stories read to us and all the lights in our dorm left on too.’

‘But now Matron says I have to go for my afternoon nap or I shall be weally wavver fwactious by tea time.’