For the second time in as many days, Buckingham Palace has felt obliged to comment on Prince Andrew’s association with convicted sex offender, the late Jeffrey Epstein, and in particular has made mention of footage that emerged of the Prince in Mr Epstein’s New York mansion in 2010; suggesting what appears to be a furtive goodbye to a young unidentified woman leaving the property is being widely misinterpreted.
Speaking to the press a Palace forelock-tugging lackey said: ‘Well yes, the Prince does appear to be behaving in somewhat furtive manner but that is not the case. Upon checking his diary for that day he had some extremely important Ducal duties to undertake and he was obviously preoccupied with them. You know making a speech and shaking hands and so forth.’
‘As a matter of fact that young lady was a cleaner leaving the house just as the Prince happened to be peering out into the street from behind the partially open door in a highly suspicious and slippery manner. Obviously because of his impeccable upbringing he was just being polite to her.’
And Andrew has found some additional support from the well-documented and high profile philanderer and serial love-cheat, Prime Minister Boris Johnson. Speaking at the G7 Summit Mr Johnson said: ‘Ah well you see, erm… Prince Andrew has my full support and he was certainly not up to any hanky-panky. He’s a bloody brilliant bloke, so how could he have been? Indeed, I have for myself, seen at first-hand all the good he has done in support of various UK businesses, so come on, what further proof does anyone need?’