In what’s being heralded as a supermarket first, Doris Poulter, an old age pensioner from Redditch, has paid for her shopping in Tesco by means of one quick contactless card transaction.

Construction Site Manager Colin Methan who was in the queue behind her said: ‘I was in a hurry but my spirits hit the floor as Doris and her wheelie just managed to get to the till in front of me. I thought, here we go, by the time she’s counted out the odd seventy-seven pence and used at least fifteen money-off vouchers my lunch break’s going to be over. So imagine my surprise when she just whipped out her bank card nice as you like and paid within seconds.’

But at this point, and just when Colin thought he was home and dry disaster struck, because it transpired Doris knew the lady on the till. She was a third cousin of Doris’s late husband’s second cousin, Alf, and subsequently Doris engaged her in a ten-minute conversation about how “Bert had to have a bag fitted” and “Alice was found dead in her flat after having lain there undiscovered for three days”. Oh, it was terrible, love.”

A starving Colin later confirmed: ‘In the end I had to put my stuff back on the shelves as I had a meeting scheduled at two.’