Fears are growing for the wellbeing of self-help guru and barefaced chancer, Paul McKenna.

Concerns began to build when it was pointed out in one daytime magazine programme that so far in the run-up to Christmas, he’s not yet appeared on any such shows to shamelessly flog yet another tawdry ‘method’ for losing weight, making us feel better about ourselves or some other load of complete and utter hackneyed nonsense.

This Morning’s Phillip Schofield told reporters: ‘Yes, now it’s been highlighted I was just saying to Holly (Willoughby) that there’s been no sign of him this year which is really very odd. Because for at least the past fifteen years we’ve had him foisted on us, peddling his latest brand of snake-oil in that irritating mid-Atlantic 70s Radio 1 DJ drawl he puts on.’

‘Mind you everything he flogs can be condensed into doing the bleeding obvious, can’t it?,’ adds Schofield. I can make you slimmer – don’t eat so much, stop watching Lorraine and take more exercise you lardy-arsed porker. I can save you money – don’t spend so much on stuff you don’t need or can’t afford. Durr… none of this is rocket science. I mean, come on!’

The former stage hypnotist who gave up a gruelling schedule of live theatre and TV shows when he found it was more lucrative to dupe millions, just by sitting on his arse at home and flogging them trite so-called self-help programmes instead, is perhaps best-known for his series: I Can Make Me Rich and its follow-up, I Can Make Me Even Richer, both multi million-selling titles around the globe.