One of the new intake of weirdos and misfits recently hired by prime minister Dominic Cummings, has resigned from his post after claiming he has been “hounded out by the media in a cynical witch hunt”.
A furious Andrew Sabisky announced he was quitting his role because people said his view that black people were mentally inferior wasn’t very nice and certainly not in keeping with a government that likes to pretend it isn’t riven with institutional racism.
“That’s the trouble with today’s snowflake society, they don’t like hearing the truth in much the same way that they deny the pseudoscience of eugenics should not be wholly embraced,” said Sabisky.
“They fail to grasp the undoubted benefits of mandatory contraception for thickos. Snowflakes think this is in some way sinister and the top a slippery slope to a Big Brother society.”
“I signed up to do vital work and this kind of selective quoting, say when I said that women’s sport is on a par with the Paralympics, is unfair.”
“If I can’t do my work without character assassination I’m quitting. Media hysteria about my old stuff online is wrong. Look, these were just things I was unable to delete in time before they were discovered. That’s all.’
When it was pointed out to Deputy PM Boris Johnson that Sabisky’s position was now untenable he said, “I only met this Nijinsky fellow once at a team building weekend at Dominic’s place. Shame he’s quitting though. Seemed like a decent chap.”